There Comes a Time...

...when you need to grow up. You might be forced upon the idea, whether you're ready or not. Or, as much as you'd like to think you're ready and that you're perfectly capable of growing up, chances are you're not. "Growing up" can be defined by numerous events and situations, depending on who is doing the growing up. From graduating preschool to starting high school, turning 16 and getting your license to turning 21 to have that first (legal) drink, finally getting that college diploma and searching for the right job to realizing it's time to be out on your own and house hunting.

- insert me here -

So here I am. Two weeks prior to my 24th birthday, sitting cross-legged on my bed, thumbing through the Courier and the latest issue of Homes, circling potential options, and searching Google for local real estate businesses to see more information on those potential options. Do I go for a condo or a house? Should I try to rent for a few months to keep saving money or just go for it? How many bedrooms do I really need? Do I want a roommate to help cover some of the bills? There are so many questions I have and nobody to answer them but myself. Depending on how much I am approved for, I know what direction I'm leaning towards, however, I am very open to suggestions and advice. Wish me luck!

96.

(I know, two posts in two days? It's a record for me.)

In a couple hours, at midnight, it will be September 21, 2011. The day that my Grandma Eunie would have turned 96. Like I said in my last post, just yesterday, I believe that everything happens for a reason. I know that it was her time to go, and I am beyond blessed to have spent her last hours with her. I'm also a firm believer in that nothing lasts forever, after all, people die. It's expected. I remember when (her husband) Grandpa Chet passed away, almost ten years ago. Death of a loved one is something you just don't forget about...which brings me to this.

Does life really go on after death? Does Heaven exist? I just finished a book, The Ten Best Days of My Life, where a woman explains just that.

I'm not going to give too much away, but it seriously made me wonder about what Heaven is like. Can the deceased really communicate and connect with those who are still living? And then, I think about the idea of white bufferflies signifying angels. Is that true? Last year, a week or two after my Grandma Eunie passed away, I was in the pool at my Grandma Karen's, and a white butterfly came by. My Grandma Karen said to me, "she's here with us, you know." Then, one year ago tomorrow, I was driving up to Minneapolis for a sports career fair, sponsored by the Minnesota Twins. As I'm driving, I see a white butterfly flutter by (that is what they do, isn't it?)

Anyways, what's I'm getting at is, those who have a place in our hearts, have a place there forever. They live on within us. Whether we "see" them in a white butterfly, "feel" them in the wind, or "hear" their voice, they're there. And this, is where my Grandma Eunie is...

Happy 96th Birthday, Grandma Eunie. I love you and miss you more than anything.

Slacking

I know, where have I been right? Well, is anyone actually even reading this? Not that it matters, because writing is a part of life. For some reason, it's much easier for me to express my feelings through written words, rather than words spoken. Why is that? Give me a piece of paper and a pencil, or a computer, and I could go on for hours. Put me face to face with someone or something, and I'd be lucky to get a few sentences out.

I have to admit, through my eight years of working, five years of college, the last two years of what we'll call - starting my career, and all of the people I've met in between, I've grown up. I've learned how to deal with difficult people, in complicated situations, with diverse opinions. I believe that God put you on Earth to serve a purpose, and he brings people into your life and takes them out for a reason. I'm still trying to figure out what those reasons are...

Mack the Knife

It's very hard to believe that one year ago tonight, I was sitting in a nursing home with a number of extended family members, just hours before my great grandma Eunie took her last breath. I remember the day like it was yesterday.

My grandma had been sick for the last two weeks and I had gone to see her every single day. No matter how tired she was, and even though she could hardly see, she knew it was me every single time I came to see her. Every time I left, I gave her a hug and a kiss, and told her I would see her tomorrow. I had switched my hours at work starting August 2nd, my first day of my second term at Kaplan, so I would come in at 1:00 PM, leave at 5:30 PM, and go to class at 6:00 PM. I figured this worked out best so I could still have time to spend with my grandma Eunie.

I went up around noon, and was a few minutes late to work. My dad called around 4:00 when he left work and said he was going to see her. I told him I had gone up to see her before work, and that she was doing pretty well. He said he would call me after he left. No more than 15 minutes later, my phone rang again. Dad. I don't remember the exact words but it was something like, "Lindsey. You need to come here now." I asked why but answered my own question with "okay" and hung up. As the tears welled in my eyes and a lump formed in my throat, I walked into my bosses office and said I had to leave. It was the longest 10-minute driver I've ever taken. I fought tears while contemplating stopping to get gas as my light was on. I kept praying to make it there before it was too late. I got there just before 5:00, and ran to her room. It was a very long evening and I was tired, hungry, sad, exhausted, scared, nervous... She passed away at 12:40 AM. I can't begin to say how thankful I am to have spent her last hours with her, to watch her take her last breath.

True Love

Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,

it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.

Love never fails.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.

But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13

Two of my very good friends, Stephanie & Nick, are a prime example of 'true love.' Last summer, I spent quite a lot of time with the two of them, but it wasn't until Labor Day weekend that we started spending most of that time together. Sunday night, Lexi & I decided to go to the Screaming Eagle and Nick & Blake were there. After a few hours of conversation, music & beer, Blake took us into Newton's and cooked for us.

Blake was in and out of the kitchen while Lexi, Nick and I watched people leave what used to be Roux Orleans and is now Black's 501 Piano Bar. It was a great way to bring summer to an end and celebrate Labor Day.





When Nick saw this picture, the first thing he said was, "it looks like I'm trying to fart and she knows it." Needless to say, it was probably true and we laughed about it 'til our stomachs hurt and we had tears in our eyes.

We all ended up crashing at Nick's place, which was a loft above the Screaming Eagle. The next morning, we were laying around watching Astro Boy when Steph called. "I think I'll swing by!" Once I hung up the phone, Nick asked me who I was talking to. "Steph," I replied. "Stephanie Tansey?! I've had a crush on her forever! Oh my God..." and then he proceeded to begin sweeping and Swiffer-ing his nearly spotless place. Blake and I decided to keep them company and went to lunch at Chapala's, where we enjoyed enchiladas with "creamy white sauce" and margaritas. Steph and I took a trip to Target after lunch (for some pocket t's) and hung out until we went over to Nick's for pizza and game night.

And so it went from this...

...and phone calls and talks with each of them about how great the other one is and how happy they are, to this...

Throughout my relationship with each of them and their relationship with each other, I've learned a lot about life, myself, friendship, and love. I would often scrunch up my nose or make gagging noises whenever they'd kiss each other or say 'I love you' in front of me, but I now realize that they were and still are truly, madly (deeply) in love with each other. That kind of life doesn't come easy, and not everyone is blessed to experience it. I couldn't be happier for them and I am beyond thankful for being a part of their life.

Taysen James

It's been a ridiculously long time since I've posted. Here's what (or who) has been consuming 90% of my time the past two months...

It's amazing how quickly you can fall in love with someone you barely know...

...and even crazier how fast they grow up. Happy two-month birthday Taysen! More pictures to come...

Oh, The Places You'll Go...

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...
-- Dr. Seuss, Oh! The Places You'll Go! 

As you should have figured out by now, I will officially be done with college in one (!) week. Which leads me to think of very random things...

1. Take alcohol for instance. I know a number of people who have been finished with college for a few years (or a select few who decided to skip college and go straight to the 'Real World') ... and it seems like all they do outside of work is go out and party. At least four days a week. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy a night out with friends and having a couple beers, but to go out more than two nights in one week for me is about impossible. Sure, I'm still in school, and I work pretty much full-time, and I am in my early-20's, but I'm beginning to think I've outgrown the "party" stage of life. This is where those people come into play. These people who go out Sunday, Monday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday and then start it all over again. These people who get black-out drunk every time they drink. These people who spend endless amounts of money on what? A fun night that they won't remember?

2. Acquaintances. Perhaps someone you graduated from high school with, had a college class together, or a co-worker from a previous part-time job. Someone whom you've talked to maybe a handful of times, where the typical conversation goes like this:
Hi, how are you? "Good! How about you?" Good! What have you been up to?! "Not much, school, work, family, etc. what about you?" Oh the same...well it was good seeing you. "You too!" Someone who tries (or appears to try) to make plans. I'm a person who has a few GREAT friends, rather than several "so-so" friends. Sure, I know a lot of people, and I won't hesitate saying hi to someone if I see them out, but I'm happy with my few closest friends.

3. Children. Don't get me wrong, I love kids. The thing that bothers me is the mom (or dad, or both) don't live up to their titles. A lot of my friends have children, or are expecting. There is no doubt in my mind that these women will be amazing mothers, as several of them don't have dad in the picture. If you are responsible enough to have [unprotected] sex, get pregnant, and choose to keep your child, then you need to be responsible enough to care for and raise your child.

4. Travel. I want to see the world. I haven't been many places...Texas, Las Vegas, UP of Michigan, Minnesota, Chicago, Wisconsin, St. Louis and Kansas City about sum it up. I want travel to be a part of my business life. My dad has gone on business trips since I can remember, and has met so many great people. I want that in my life.

I was up until 4:30am doing discussion posts and writing papers. Right now, I've got a few lists calling my name so I can graduate by May 31st. I wonder why I continue to procrastinate so much? 9 more days...I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...